Notice: Persons attempting to find a "text" in this [story] will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a "subtext" in it will be banished; persons attempting to explain, interpret, explicate, analyze, deconstruct, or otherwise "understand" it will be exiled to a desert island in the company only of other explainers. †

TI-32

To the lady that just feverishly ripped open the packaging of a TI-32 calculator at the bus stop like a drug-addict: feel ya’ sister.